Double Takes

Sometimes my eye will catch part of a word and my brain will attempt to fill in the missing letters. Other times I just come across something that I have to take another look at. I usually find these little episodes funny, and so I share a few here.

I was walking past a bookstore one evening and glanced at the books in the window. It was a brisk night so I wasn't stoppping to peruse the titles. Out of the corner of I my eye I saw a book that I thought was titled Sex, Love, and Diarrhea. This unlikely grouping brought me to a sudden stop so I could look again. Closer examination revealed that the actual title was Sex, Love, and Dharma. I don't know what the book is about, but it has to be better than than what I initially thought.

I was driving past a church recently and saw they had a message board. As I snuck a glance at the sign I read "Feed your faith and your donuts will starve". While there is a police station nearby, I doubted the church was really condoning pastry genocide. I also doubted that the cops would stand for it. Furthermore, I doubted that I had read the sign correctly. Sure enough, a second look showed my doubts were correct and it really said "...your doubts will starve". If only I had gotten a hint.

Recently the Human Resources department at work covered the walls with posters that said "Quit today. Live better tomorrow", and "How many reasons do you need to quit?" This was not a new head count reduction program. In reality these posters are for a smoking cessation program, but you have to read the bottom portion of the poster to know that. A co-worker mentioned this to one of the HR people and they said they'd never thought of it that way. These are the people who do my paycheck. Yet another reason to quit.


I shot this photo outside our vetrenarian's office. Maybe the security people are hiding behind the sign?

Rambling Rant: Bass Ackwards

This rant is for those members of the driving public that prefer to back into parking spaces. If you are one of these people, consider this a public service announcement just for you. Enjoy!

Parking backward takes skill and finesse. You do not have any. You invariably end up on the line and too close to the car next to you. Nine times out of ten your vehicle is crooked.

To quote Mr. Spock, parking bass ackwards is illogical. Does it really make more sense to back into a space ten foot wide and twelve foot long, then it does to back out of a parking spot into a much larger area?

Have you noticed that it takes you longer to park this way? While you are trying to cram your SUV into a parking spot that you can't see because your eyes face the wrong way, I have parked my vehicle, gone into the store, made my purchases, and are leaving before you can hit my car.

If you have one of those vehicles that beep while you are in reverse, take note of how long you hear it. If the sound lasts longer than 30 seconds you are probably in violation of local noise pollution laws.

So, please, stop it. Just don't do it... for the children. Or the spotted owl. Or whatever.

End of rant.